Monday, 25 January 2016


Hi, Dear Readers - and happy Tuesday to you all. At least, I hope it's a happy Tuesday for you guys. Personally I'm reeling from some not-very-nice news right now, so I extend my deepest sympathies to anyone else having a bad week. Don't worry, it's not anything fatal - and maybe I'll find a way to talk about it in the weeks to come - but for the moment, I'm going to skip any attempts at cheery banter, and just offer up the fruits of my labour instead: the promised Epic Character Quiz, which contains all ten of the main characters from all my published books.

Now, I tend to think of and refer to certain characters *other* than the viewpoint characters and their love interests as main characters, too, such as Akira from Shadows on the Moon and Arian in FrostFire. But those guys are not in the quiz. Not through lack of love on my part. Just because by the time I'd written the detailed character profiles for half my viewpoint and love interest characters, I'd already started to lose the will to live, and so it seemed wisest to accept my limitations and keep things simple. I had NO IDEA how much work went into these things, kids. It's exhausting.

There's such a wide variety of people in my books that I hope this might be interesting even for people who haven't read of them, so feel free to share on Facebook or whatever. Enjoy it, my lovelies.

THE EPIC QUIZ: Which of my Characters are You?

Ever wondered what kind of hero you'd make if you found yourself within the pages of your favourite YA novel? Well, now you can answer a variety of cunning and insightful questions to find out! Which main character from my books do you most resemble, and why? Featuring the main characters from all my published novels.


You are sensitive, compassionate, and overwhelmingly empathetic. You take comfort and strength from being close to nature - you love animals and green places. Although life is not always kind to someone as open and intensely nurturing as you, you still try to help others whenever and however you can: making the world a better place is as natural to you as breathing.

Unfortunately you have a tendency to listen to the bad things people say about you and forget the good, and be hard on yourself in all the wrong ways. At times you might believe that your kindness makes you weak, that all you're good for is taking care of and supporting other people, that you're not capable of great things in your own right. Don't let fear hold you back from reaching your full potential - you will never know how strong and brave you are unless you are willing to take a chance now and again.

Strengths: natural healing ability and connection to nature - birds literally sing everytime you are near
Weaknesses: fear and insecurity
Weapon of choice: being so lovable you force people to behave well. Also, magic.
Big Secret: You can talk to animals


You are ambitious, focused and goal orientated - you love animals and wild places, and have a soft spot for people in distress. Once you set your mind on a task no one will ever convince you to divert from it, and you'd carve your own heart out rather than break a promise. This single-mindedness can be a strength, but on other occasions it might lead you to take seemingly crazy risks or be a little oblivious to danger or other people's well-founded concerns.

Knowing what you want is a good thing - just don't ignore everything else in your quest to achieve it. You're good at a lot of things. Don't take that for granted. Enjoy life and make room for new ideas and new people as well. Everyone will be happier for it.

Strengths: determination and devotion to people and ideals
Weaknesses: pigheadedness and insensitivity
Weapon of choice: a pack of highly trained hunting dogs
Big Secret: You cry over puppies, don't even deny it


You are charismatic, resourceful and courageous. Where you lead, other people can't help but follow - you believe so passionately in what is right that you almost glow with it, and that is a powerful thing. But with great power comes great responsibility, and although being a leader comes naturally to you, you don't always love it, especially when it comes with making tough decisions which don't actually fit in with that same powerful sense of right and wrong. Don't let others pile too much on your shoulders - they might think that you're strong enough to carry anything, and you might think it's your job, but remember: you're human. And you are not to blame for the results of choices that were forced on you, or which you didn't even make.

Take the people that you trust into your confidence. Let them see your worry, your doubts, and your tiredness. They won't respect you any less, and you won't be letting them down. They will only love you more, and you never know, they might even be able to help.

Strengths: natural leadership and badassery
Weaknesses: overdeveloped sense of responsibility
Weapon of choice: a double-edged broadsword
Big Secret: Beautiful music moves you to tears


You are mature, thoughtful and ambitious - but your plans are always tempered with a strong sense of morality and caution. You think three steps ahead of everyone else and sometimes your mental processes are a complete mystery, even to those closest to you. You've suffered some great losses in your life, and it has left you with a determination to look out for others, to organise and care for them, and prevent them from having to endure the same things you have. But sometimes in your efforts to keep things safely under control you hide your feelings a bit too well, and come across as cynical, manipulative, or even desperate for power.

Nevertheless, those that know you also know that anyone in need can rely on you to offer not only genuine help but true kindness, and that your intentions are always good. You don't have to be ashamed of your driven personality, but also don't be afraid to allow your vulnerabilities and humanity to shine through as well.

Strengths: cunning and sharp intelligence
Weaknesses: finding it difficult to open up emotionally
Weapon of choice: words, but a razor-sharp blade hidden a cane works too
Big Secret: you melt the second anyone plays with your hair


You are sensitive, romantic and optimistic. You love books and learning, but you're equally at home outdoors. You occasionally give the impression of being a large, naive puppy who heedlessly gallops around trying to make friends with everyone whether they like it or not, and it's true that you always seek the best in people and situations, and have a pure and natural joy in life - but you're also highly intelligent, with a quality of piercing insight that allows you to see through the illusions and lies others cloak themselves in, when you pay attention. Your optimism springs not from ignorance, but from a choice to seek out happiness in whatever way you can.

Remember, though, that not everyone can be the same as you. Your task in life isn't to wipe out other people's scars or to convert them to your way of seeing things. Value other people's caution, shrewdness and wisdom instead of dismissing them, and instead of trying to heal their scars, except that their pain makes them who they are and learn to see the beauty in their darkness. By doing so, you may teach them to do the same, which will make them love you all the more.

Strengths: endless faith in others which helps them be the best they can be
Weaknesses: obliviousness
Weapon of choice: you're equally at home holding a pen or a longbow
Big Secret: you write love poetry, and you're actually really good at it


You are passionate, creative and strong-willed - the kind of unforgettable personality whose magnetism will change all those around you in one way or another. The problem with being such a striking and fascinating person, though, is that many will react to you as an object that they seek either to possess or destroy through jealousy. At times it might seem that the world is filled with random cruelty, or even that something about you provokes it. You may have internalised this message more than you realise, and have begun to believe you deserve to be unhappy.

Let go of the past. Don't let other people's jealousy, cruelty or hardness mar your faith in the inherent goodness of humanity, or lure you away from the unique and brilliant creative path you instinctively seek. You are not to blame for other people's actions, and you don't owe anyone anything. Be yourself. Yourself is good enough for the world and for the people who know and value you for who you truly are.

Strengths: a chameleon-like ability to adapt to almost any situation
Weaknesses: sometimes you lose yourself in trying to be what others want you to be
Weapon of choice: illusions, clever words, and shadows. Also, magic.
Big Secret: love poems reduce your knees to jelly


Book: FrostFire

You are idealistic, courageous and a born leader - just being around you brings out the best in others, and people naturally seek to bask in your sunny presence. You would fling yourself head first into a fire to help anyone, even a stranger or someone you had reason to dislike - but usually your efforts to inspire and help others are far more rational than that, informed by a shrewd tactical mind and natural observation which makes your idealism all the more beautiful. You have the power to change minds, hearts, and lives, just by being you.

Which such an extreme personality as yours, though, there may be times when those close to you feel as if they're dealing less with an equal and more someone sitting on pedestal above them. Listen when people try to tell you about their feelings, instead of instantly attempting to reassure them or dismiss or persuade them away from their doubts. Sometimes, much as you don't want to admit it, their doubts may have merit - you're smart enough to realise that, and to offer real help. Make yourself into the welcoming pair of arms that you can be, instead of a wall that lesser people bounce off.

Strengths: bravery and badassery
Weaknesses: you think you can make the whole world agree with you. You can't.
Weapon of Choice: if it has a pointy bit, you can fight with it
Big Secret: You get scared too, even if no one sees it


Book: FrostFire

You are compassionate, empathetic and forceful, especially during a crisis, when you will be rock steady, doing whatever needs to be done, even while your insides are turning to jelly. You've been through hard times, and it's made you wary and even cynical about others sometimes, but it's never made you cold. Though you maintain a stolid exterior, it doesn't take much - nothing more than a simple and sincere offer of friendship - to expose the true sweetness of your nature.

You sometimes act as if you're waiting for something, perhaps some form of external validation, to truly relax and start to live your life to the full. But the only form of recognition that really matters is your own. You have to realise that no matter what has happened in the past, life is yours for the taking now, and that there are people around you who deserve your full trust and love. Stop making excuses for yourself (and people in your history who may have treated you badly), decide what is really important to you, and just go for it. The results will surprise and delight you.

Strengths: an absolute rock of strength during hard times
Weaknesses: struggling to believe anyone wants you around when hard times are over
Weapon of Choice: A double-headed war-axe
Big Secret: You're a berserk fighter, and anyone who gets you riled is going DOWN


You are brave, quick-thinking and resourceful, with a strong sense of responsibility for other people and deep-seated qualities of leadership and decisiveness. But sometimes you can also be careless - even reckless - especially with your own safety, and you tend to be manipulative when you think it's for a good cause, because you're just so sure that you're right... even when you're not.

You suffer with a slight inferiority complex, even though everyone around you can see how truly special and great you are. Don't beat yourself up too much about your mistakes. Others are right to put their faith in you, but ultimately you are not responsible for the well-being of the whole world.

Strengths: bravery and badassery
Weaknesses: recklessness and a tendency to think you're a lone-wolf (you're not)
Weapon of choice: single edged blade
Big Secret: you might be... a teeny tiny bit... immortal? Maybe.


You are noble-minded, sensitive and romantic, and your best quality is your instinctive protectiveness towards anyone you care for, or who seems vulnerable and in need of help. This can lead you to great acts of kindness or courage that disdain your own well-being - but it might also cause you to act in ways which hurt the very people you seek to protect, because you forget that others have the right to make their own choices, even if those choices might endanger them or your relationships with them.

Learn to talk to others about your fears and let them make their own decisions, and you will develop stronger relationships that can survive your occasional lapses into defensiveness. You do not have to fight to deserve people's love: you already have it.

Strengths: protectiveness and badassery
Weaknesses: defensiveness and tendency to excessive guilt
Weapon of choice: twin single-edged blades
Big Secret: You know more than you're telling. A lot more

What your dream holiday be like?

A long stay in an isolated cabin in lush green forests, by yourself - or with your nearest and dearest only
In a castle high on a mountain with views for miles around, with your chosen family gathered close by
With a friend or two, in a bustling city surrounded by new things to do and new people to meet
In a large group of friends - doesn't matter where so long as you're together!
On a beautiful, peaceful beach, by yourself or with family only

Which ability would feel the most natural for you?

To be able to heal almost any illness or injury to others
A natural genius for hand-to-hand, armed combat, and general badassery
The ability to convince others to follow you, and to lead them brilliantly
A unique analytical mind, which allows you to get out of any kind of trouble
Powerful illusion magic, so that you could never be caught or held by others

What kind of bird would you be?

A silent yet powerful swan
A swift and savage falcon
A golden voiced skylark
A cunning magpie
A lonely wandering seagull

What is your worst nightmare?

Watching someone be hurt without being able to help
Disappointing and letting people you care for down
You're invisible and no one can see, hear, or remember you
You're late to class, there's a test - whoops, you're naked!
The monsters are coming, and your legs don't work

The enemy is attacking right now - what is your job?

Setting up an emergency medical bay for the injured
Standing your ground to hold them off as long as possible
Getting the injured and civilians to safety
Leading a small force around the back in a daring counter-attack
Assessing the situation, organising everything. and giving the orders

If you could only eat one meal for the rest of your life, what would it be?

Soft, freshly baked bread with seeds and nuts, glazed with honey, and as much butter as you want
Spicy meat curry with rice, chutney and flatbreads
A classic roast dinner with gravy, vegetables, yorkshire pudding
Delicate seafood with vegetables, rice and lashings of soy sauce
Cake, cake, cake, cake...

How do you feel about your family?

Get on brilliantly with mum, fight like cats and dogs with dad
Get on wonderfully with dad, fight like cats and dogs with mum
Love and respect both parents equally
Ack, forget about my parents - my siblings drive me insane!
Forget my parents, let me tell you about my amazing siblings...

The one thing that, no matter what, you could never do without

Your pet/s
Your boyfriend/girlfriend
Your family

You're going to get to visit a fantasy world - what kind of world do you chose?

A traditional European fairytale with magic, princesses and shapeshifters
An African-influenced world of crowns, castles, warring kingdoms and meddling Gods
A modern city filled with hidden magic, doorways to other dimensions, and monsters good and bad
A Northern Indian-influenced world of icy mountains, wild wolf-magic and haunting song
A fairytale version of Japan, filled with half-forgotten enchantments, where beauty and terror entwine

What do you fight for?

Your family
Your country
Your people
Your boy/girlfriend
What is right


Phoenixgirl said...

I got Alexandra! Some parts of the description fit (quiet, sensitive, occasionally anxious) and some don't (I'm not much of an outdoors person), but overall it seems like a good match.

Now I want to do the quiz again and try to sway the results toward different characters, just so I can see what their descriptions say!

Zoë Marriott said...

Phoenix: heh! I always do that, too. Actually, I spent so long slaving over all the profiles that I'm happy someone will read a few more of them!

Phoenixgirl said...

There used to be a quiz somewhere online called "What Diana Wynne Jones Character Are You?", and I spent quite a lot of time filling it in as if I were a particular character to see if I could get the quiz to give me the right result. Sometimes it worked, sometimes it didn't.

Rachel Balcombe said...

Did this one a few times with varying degrees of honesty to read more of the character profiles - and got Alexandra twice! So I guess that settles it :)

Zoë Marriott said...

Rachel: yep, sounds like it to me. You should probably take up gardening :)

Rachel Balcombe said...

I did in fact just buy a cyclamen... it's inevitable... :)

Kai Bishop said...

I got Frost, and can I just say:

"Strengths: an absolute rock of strength during hard times
Weaknesses: struggling to believe anyone wants you around when hard times are over"

This entire result bio is so relevant to my life right now that I'm screaming. You're a good quiz-writer. #skills.

Zoë Marriott said...

Thank you!

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